Case of the Fake People-Personal Rant

Sometimes I really wish justifiable homicide were legal in this state.

Does anybody else have someone in their life that they have to, for lack of a better phrase, 'deal with' purely on the strength of another person? (i.e. Like you have to tolerate your husbands' shitty elder brother every Christmas dinner. His bad cologne, his even worse jokes, his all around douchiness...) Have you ever wanted to take a hammer to their head?

Yeah, its totally been one of those days. What makes it bad is that often times, this person is so vindictive, miserable, and lonely that they must try their hardest to pull everyone around them into the muck of their misery. What makes it worse is that this person will smile in your face and constantly pretend they are concerned with your general well-being. What makes it ugly is that you know the slightest slip in your general treatment can result in a cataclysmic series of events thatyou never meant to put in motion in the first place.

I'm not going to say I'm perfect, but I know I'm no hypocrite and I know I'm no phony. If I genuinely don't like you, you know within the first five minutes of us meeting. Why? Because my behavior never changes. Once I don't like you, that's it. I don't drag you through the sandy beach of discomfort and then right when you think everything is finally all good, snap my claws down around your waist. No. If I'm going to snap, I do it as soon as I see your piggly-wigglies sticking out of the beach sand.

And if none of this were true, wouldn't we all be on chairs (instead of pins and needles) beating our respective in-laws to death with metal pipes? I'm just sayin'.